Sunday, 24 January 2016

Being alone is the worst feeling i ever felt

Hi,guys! Sorry for not posting often as I have been facing lots of things in my life. A few months back, lots of conflicts happened between me and my group mates and I faced depression at that stage of my life. During that period, I faced immense stress and pressure when doing project as I have to cope with their work styles and we have different opinions. I lost lots of weight due to stress and fear of eating alone. In school, you may think that I am quite popular but the truth fact is I am not. I am currently facing loneliness and in class, you can see me as the only girl sitting alone with no one beside me. Even in lecture theatre, there is one time I really sit alone. I felt really miserable and sad that such a thing happened to me and it was too overwhelming for me to process it. Being alone is my everyday's life..I get through everyday in school hoping for weekend to come quickly so that I can stay at home instead of going school. Tell you the honest truth: I changed class last semester. I cant cope with people isolating me a lot of times and leaving me out when there is impromptu lunch. I hoped for a better environment and that people will treat me well as I am a newcomer in the new class but turns out the opposite way. Sometimes I wonder to myself: "is changing class a good thing for me?" It is a good thing to a certain extent as the guys are much nicer to me than the girls but like I said, in every class, there is always these people who will be domineering and treating people with a bad attitude and they are my group mates. With the different characters we have, it is hard to communicate ideas across and disagreements appear.

Everytime after gen ed, I will go to the toilet and hide for a while, hoping people wont see me alone and also to avoid my previous classmates...Do you know how I felt at that point of time? Miserable!

Why are people treating me badly? I know partially is because of my character that causes them to dislike me...


I felt alone and depressed...I am not worth it....

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